April 12, 2010
Gay man seeks 'pretend girlfriend' on Craigslist
Phyllis Steinberg READ TIME: 2 MIN.
Dear Phyllis,
I saw this ad on the San Jose Craigslist.
$16 per hour. Use your PR/Marketing skills to be my pretend girlfriend (San Jose North)
My parents are coming to town and while here they will want to meet my girlfriend who I don't really have since I'm gay. Oh my. I need someone to play my girlfriend while they are in town... They don't know much about you (my girlfriend,) which will make this easier, but they will expect you to be easy going and fun to be around... You need to be cute, thin and between 25 and 35... If you think you'd be interested in this please send me a recent photo, a description of yourself and please tell me why you'd like this job.
Thanks, Ed
It breaks my heart. I would appreciate you sharing your thoughts about this Craigslist entry.
Thank you,
Sean
Dear Sean,
This Craigslist ad is indeed out of the ordinary. My first thought after reading the ad was: Is this for real or is Ed faking? Sometimes people who are not members of the LGBT community like to feign being gay so that they can gain an opportunity to poke fun at the LGBT community, and sometimes their ulterior motives are even more sinister. When we encounter a situation like this that seems a little unusual, we must be careful not to get conned while at the same time we must make sure we are able to offer support if it is truly needed. The ad does not say how old Ed is, but we can assume he is at least in his mid 30s since he is looking for a "girlfriend" who is between 25 and 35. Imagine how painful it must be for Ed to be living a lie for so many years. We don't know enough information about him to know why he is so afraid to come out to his parents. Would his parents be unable to accept that he is a gay man? Is the problem that Ed is too ashamed or fearful to tell his parents the truth about his sexual orientation? Maybe it's something else. Any of these scenarios is quite unfortunate.
I hope that one day Ed overcomes his fears. Nobody should have to live life hiding like this.
Phyllis
