Lesbian Couple: We Were Ejected from Hotel for Kissing

A lesbian couple says that they were thrown out of a St. Louis, Missouri, Four Seasons hotel for kissing. The hotel's management agrees that the women were asked to leave due to their public displays of affection, but also says that their sexuality was not at issue: Such behavior, whether from a same-sex couple or a heterosexual couple, would have resulted in the same response, local TV station News Channel 5 reported on Oct. 6.

Teresa Folds and Juleigh Snell aren't so sure. For one thing, they say they, the security guard who told the women that other guests had complained about them was not clear about the reason for the complaints. Also, the women said, the security guard seemed to suggest that same-sex affection was somehow not "right."

"When we got into the Jacuzzi, and we were sitting close to one another and we were kissing that a member of security came over to us," Teresa Folds told the local media. "He said that they didn't even allow heterosexual couples to kiss on their property."

"When we were explaining how gay people have rights, he basically insinuated that we were not a normal couple and should not be kissing," Snell told the press.

"They have yet to tell us what that inappropriate activity is," Folds stated. "Other than the kissing, that's all they can say because that's all we were doing."

The security guard did not press the issue. After he left, the women went back to kissing, until the guard returned and told them to leave. At that point, "I mentioned that the pool didn't close until 8:00," Folds recounted. The women were then left alone until closing time. At that point, a guard escorted the two off the property, the article said.

"It was very much understood that they were kicking us out," Folds recounted.

"I was disheartened by the whole experience," Snell said.

"Four Seasons respects the behaviors of our guests, except where doing so may be a breach of law or create tensions among people," read a statement from the general manager of the hotel, Alper Oztok. "This was the case on the night in question, as our staff received several complaints about the guests' behavior. I can assure you that the gender of the couple was never at issue."

Folds and Snell said they wanted the hotel to clarify its policies. They also said they wanted an apology, the News Channel 5 said.

Readers at the website for WFIE Channel 14, in Evansville, where the story was re-posted, offered mixed opinions.

"I am not against anyone who is gay, lesbian, transgender or anything else that is part of the gay community," one reader stated. "I have many gay and lesbian people in my life and they do not sit around and make out in public and the same goes for my heterosexual friends."

Added the reader, "I mean come on people you were at a hotel go to your room. I do not want to see gay or straight making out."

"Did they kiss or were they actually making out in the hot tub... cause that is nasty to see that no matter who is doing it.... " another reader posted.

Some offered plainly homophobic comments.

"Why do gay people think they have rights like straight people," one reader commented. "It's sick and wrong to lay down with the same sex. im sorry i cant stand gay people they need to read the bible and see different. no rhyme are reason to turn fruity," the posting continued.

"Well just because you believe its alright doesnt mean it is appropriate in public," wrote another. "Would you like it if you saw a 40 yr old man intimately kissing a 5 year old boy? Those that participate in that chosen lifestyle think thats just 'showing affection' too."

The posting went on to add, "Sounds like it was done on purpose to get attention. Well they are getting it."

Others offered their support to the couple.

"PDA's should be embrased not shot down," posted one reader. "this is one of many things wrong with todays society."

"You'd whine too if you couldn't kiss the person you love in a public place," wrote another. "People need to stop being so close-minded [sic] and judgmental."

Public displays of affection between gay and lesbian couples have been treated in a similar manner by managers and proprietors around the country and around the world. Though establishments and businesses that eject same-sex couples for public displays often claim that such behavior would not be tolerated from any couple, few if any such incidents seem to involve heterosexual couples.

In one recent case, actress Leisha Hailey of the Showtime lesbian drama "The L Word" and her girlfriend were thrown off a Southwest Airlines plane after the couple shared a kiss that drew complaints from other passengers. Hailey said the kiss had been "modest," but the airline denied that the kiss was the reason for their removal, saying that the women became verbally abusive when confronted by a flight attendant. What was unclear in any case was whether fellow passengers would have complained--or a flight attendant approached the couple--had they been heterosexual.

Hailey seemed to believe she and her partner were treated differently than a mixed-gender couple would have been, tweeting the message, "I have been discriminated against."

A follow-up tweet read, "Since when is showing affection to someone you love illegal?"

"Snogging the Friendly Skies"

In 2006, a male couple was upbraided by a flight crew and threatened by the captain after laying their heads on one another's shoulders.

Stephan Varnier and George Tsikhiseli were on an American Airlines flight from Paris to New York City when a flight attendant approached them as Varnier rested his head on Tsikhiseli's shoulder, and told the men that the flight's purser had instructed the two men "to stop that," according to Varnier, who was quoted by The New Yorker Magazine in an article on the incident.

"He [Varnier] would rest his head on my shoulder or the other way around," Tsikhiseli recounted. "We'd kiss--not kiss kiss, just mwah." Overhearing the exchange, another same-sex couple seated behind Varnier and Tsikhiseli, Ralph Jackson and David Leisner, lent their support and, the article states, "the four men... asked to speak with the purser."

When the purser stopped by their seats and heard the story, she was initially sympathetic, denying that she had issued any such instructions, according to the article's account of the men's recollections. The purser's attitude remained sympathetic, in the article's recounting, until the moment Tsikhiseli asked whether a mixed-gender couple would have been approached in such a manner by a member of the flight staff. At that point, according to the article, the pursuer told the men, "Kissing is inappropriate behavior on an airplane."

When the men attempted to continue the dialogue later in the flight, the pursuer reportedly told them that the plane would be diverted if the men continued to make an issue of the way they'd been treated. The men said that they kept quiet after that, but nonetheless Tsikhiseli was later summoned by the flight's captain, who told him to "stop arguing with the crew" or he would divert the plane.

The captain reportedly sent Tsikhiseli back to his seat with the words, "I want you to go back to your seat and behave the rest of the flight," the implication being that a diversion of the plane--a measure ordinarily reserved for situations involving threatening passengers, and which can lead to felony charges--would result unless the men accepted their chastening without further protest.

Three years ago in San Francisco, a gay male couple were tossed out of a wine bar after sharing a brief kiss in front of the establishment's owner, who physically assaulted them while screaming anti-0gay epithets such as "faggot" and "pervert."

A protest attended by about 50 people took place in front of the wine bar, the Internos Wine Cafe, a few days later.

Earlier this year, a British gay couple was ejected from a pub after sharing a peck witnessed by the proprietor.

Jonathan Williams and James Bull shared a "snog" at their table at the John Snow pub in the trendy London neighborhood, but, they say, they were not behaving in an "obscene" manner, as the landlady claimed they were.

"We weren't being over the top; there wasn't anything that would be deemed unseemly," Williams told British newspaper the Guardian, which published an article on the incident on April 15. "I'm not the kind of person to do that kind of thing in public."

A witness verified this, telling the Guardian that the men were "snogging, but it wasn't heavy petting." Nonetheless, another man who was drinking nearby told them to stop kissing and said that he was the landlord.

The two rejoined that they were simply kissing, and went back to their evening. Later, as Bull was getting ready to leave, he gave Williams another kiss--which he described as "a peck on the lips"--and the woman claiming to be the landlady accosted them.

"She said we had to leave because we were being obscene," Bull recounted. "Then the other guy from earlier came over again and said we had to leave now, we 'weren't allowed to do that.' "The men said that the man took hold of Williams' coat by the lapels as he was speaking to him. Other patrons called for the pair to be left in peace.

"I was totally shocked," said Lucy Clements, who was at a nearby table when the situation unfolded. "Dumbfounded, really. From a pub in the middle of Soho you just don't expect it."

When Clements talked to pub staff, she was told that the man who had grasped Williams by the lapels was the landlord--and then she and her companion were told to leave, as well.

Bull, upset, went home and called the police to make a complaint, the article said.

"I felt so belittled, and to be made to feel so dirty and cheap over something like that--it's just wrong," Bull told the newspaper.

Meantime, Williams took his complaint public via Twitter.

"Seven years in London & I've never been made to feel bad for being gay," he tweeted on the night of April 13. "45 min ago the John Snow pub, W1F had me removed for kissing a date."

"W1F" referred to the pub's London locale.

London's gay community was outraged. The tweet was picked up and passed around, two Facebook pages were established, and it wasn't long before two kiss-ins were scheduled to take place at the pub in protest, one of them slated for April 15 and the follow-up for about a week later. Hundreds signed up for the events.