Dr. Carpenter Helps Make Your New Year's Resolutions a Success!

Winnie McCroy READ TIME: 4 MIN.

Dr. Kristen Carpenter, Ph.D., director of women's behavioral health at The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center, challenges you to ask yourself three simple questions about your resolutions so that 2016 can be a success: Do they align with my values; are my eggs in different baskets; and are there too many?

"Popular wisdom suggests that more often than not, they fail because they give up," Dr. Carpenter told EDGE. "New Year's resolutions are an annual ritual, but by the time February or March rolls around, they have fallen by the wayside."

People often make resolutions related to health and wellness, such as losing weight or getting fit. Another big area is self care, i.e., promising to do more for yourself this year. Another big one is getting organized, said Dr. Carpenter. The first step to make your resolutions stick is choosing them carefully.

"If you're choosing something that's tough for you, focus on only one or two things," said Dr. Carpenter. "If you're trying to knock out a handful of simple, straightforward things, then a few more is okay. But don't resolve to change much more than three to five things, even if they seem simple at the time. You can always go back to your list and start another one."

Likewise, said Dr. Carpenter, you'll have more success if you resolve to a series of small and large goals.

"One of the things about the goals in general is that the more intention you have to do it, the more likely you will do it. The same holds for self efficacy -- how much you think you can achieve it has a lot to do whether you do," said Dr. Carpenter. "It's about what you can reasonably achieve and how much you care about it. Then you just follow the rules of goal-setting to get you there: have goals be more action-oriented, specific and measurable. Feedback is really important, so weight is a classic example. Set goals that are narrowly achieved: rather than just saying you'll get fit, promise to increase your activity to 120 minutes a week, or to lose this amount, so you can see how you're doing. Come March, instead of wondering, 'Am I really more fit,' which you can't really know, you can see if you made it working out for 120 minutes. It can feel really good to know you're doing it, and the feedback can you're your motivation up."

When choosing your resolutions, also make sure that they meet the following earmarks:

  • Do they align with my values? Your energy and time is finite. If you're crafting resolutions that are not in line with your values, reevaluate your list and replace them with ones that are more cohesive to your overall goals. If not, Dr. Carpenter says you are setting yourself up to fail.

  • Are my eggs in different baskets? Make sure your resolutions reflect different areas of your life. Dr. Carpenter says that it's better to not put all your eggs in one basket. In your 20s, it's tempting to have all of your New Year's resolutions focus on your career. In your 30s you may focus on family life. In midlife, it's tempting to have your resolutions focus on the home and empty nest syndrome. A better approach is creating resolutions that will enhance multiple areas of your life. For example, resolving to to live in the moment helps achieve both career and personal goals.

  • Are there too many? Let's be honest, even without resolutions, the holidays are a stressful time. If you already feel like you're being spread too thin, you likely will not be able to keep multiple New Year's resolutions. To edit your list, first rank your resolutions in order of importance and then keep only the top few. Dr. Carpenter says this gives you a better chance of meeting your goals.

    Do whatever you need to help motivate you toward reaching these goals. For example, you might be motivated to quit smoking if you promise that you will save the money you would have spent on cigarettes and take a trip.

    "Especially with something like smoking that's so expensive, having the money in your pocket or even putting that money aside in a jar or separate account that you can watch grow and decide what to do with it can be very motivating," said Dr. Carpenter.

    If resolutions are not for you, you're not alone. In fact, Dr. Carpenter said that she she prefers to use New Year's Eve as a benchmark to assess her life, and decide what good habits she wants to start.

    "It feels fresh because it's a New Year, and a fresh start. But it's not really different, it's just a matter of timing," said Dr. Carpenter. "If you want to set a New Year's resolution, that's great. But you can also do it on your birthday, or in the spring, or when the thaw comes... the most important thing is deciding what works for you and when. Resolutions are all about finding ways to make it work."


    by Winnie McCroy , EDGE Editor

    Winnie McCroy is the Women on the EDGE Editor, HIV/Health Editor, and Assistant Entertainment Editor for EDGE Media Network, handling all women's news, HIV health stories and theater reviews throughout the U.S. She has contributed to other publications, including The Village Voice, Gay City News, Chelsea Now and The Advocate, and lives in Brooklyn, New York.

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